We all have differences in parenting techniques. Some people think the way I do things are crazy and I believe some of the things other parents do are crazy. One way Cheri and I differ are letting them do things on their own. I'm all about letting them do things on their own, that's how they learn. Cheri is more of a worrier which I guess in most cases is what the mother does.
Sometimes its little things like letting your child go free at Walmart while you shop, to bigger things like driving. I took Skyler for her first driving lesson, I'm more built that way emotionally because I'm very laid back and I never yell. So off we went. We headed out to the country and I asked her if she's driven yet, she said she had but out in a field. Her mother thought she should start off in a neighborhood so once I got out in the country, I pulled into the entrance of a neighborhood and we switched seats. Then drove out of the neighborhood, that counts, right? We took back roads all the way out to a local small town. I won’t go into how she did, let’s just say, thank God her mom wasn’t in the car. I’m not sure how a 16 year old doesn’t know what a stop sign means but that’s how you learn. We eventually made it into the town. It’s a one stoplight town that extends a block away in all 4 directions from that stop sign. She did pretty good in town when other cars were around, she was a lot more careful. Then she did a lot better all the way back to that neighborhood. I threw her in and she did fine, eventually. (Not that I take credit for her driving ability now, yikes!)
Skyler is flying back to Virginia for Christmas. I asked why she doesn’t just drive? Cheri gave me a WTF are you thinking look. She has made the trip once before but she was following her mom home, so it’s not like she hasn’t been on the highways. I understand she scares the crap out of her because she just doesn’t pay attention. But I’m the more, go for it, let’s see what happens, kind of parent. She’ll have to learn how to do it sooner or later. I’m pretty sure she’s probably driven on a few interstates without us knowing anyways. Now Cheri says that she and her mom couldn’t survive the worrying if she was to drive it. But guess what? You’re a parent, you’ll never stop worrying about her. When Cheri and I were dating 600 miles apart, my mom worried about me making the trip. I was by myself and I would tend to leave right after work and drive 9 hours. Sometimes through the night. Your always going to worry. Cheri used to drive the same trip when she was 16, I used to drive to St. Louis which is around 400 miles when I was 16. I know she can do it.
I don’t care if she flies, I just think it would be cheaper to drive. I would rather drive it so I have a car there. So I can take more stuff instead of limiting myself to a bag or two (not that I would need more than a bag, but she’s a teenage girl, we know how they are).
I’m not saying either way is right, we just parent differently. What kind of parent are you, throw them in and let them sink or swim or do you tend to take the cautious route so you have less to worry about?
Our boy is thirty-two and my wife still frets over him constantly. He rattles easily and I tell her he always will if she keeps rushing to the rescue. I think you're right about it being a male versus female thing. There's a reason the phone company puts on more operators for Mother's Day than they do for Father's Day.
ReplyDeleteI'm not a parent at all. I'm an uncle, so that disqualifies me completely. Uncles are all about "Let's try this and see what happens!"
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