Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Attention Ladies and Dudes

I have to make an announcement.  Today, I am officially a man.  No, I wasn’t a woman before and just finished my surgery.  I got an official man card earlier today.  As you should know if you read my drivel, I’ve entered in the Dude Write contest a few times.  Today, I finally received a man card.  It wasn’t one of the top billing ones (Diamond, Platinum or Gold) but that doesn’t surprise me because there are some great writers over there.  I can’t vote for myself, but I wouldn’t anyways because I never think I’m in the top 3.  But they also have a Chairman’s Choice award where the previous week’s winners get to pick one.  WilyGuy chose my post “Dating Mrs. Palmer” for one of the cards.

Thanks bro, or should I say, Dude.  I guess I should have known it was going to take a post about masturbation to impress other guys.  Be sure to check out the Dude Write site for some other great writers that are men.
To celebrate my win, I decided to make myself like one of the manly men out there.
Shave Tom’s head and it’s close.  I’m rocking that mustache.
I posted this picture (the one on the right, I know they look like the same guy) on my Facebook, Twitter and Instagram figuring I’d get all kinds of comments.  I did get one, and this is the type of comment I was expecting.
Jeff Laws(1)
So at least one of my friends didn’t let me down.  I actually didn’t leave the mustache, I was in the process of shaving it all off and thought I’d stop and take a picture.  But I haven’t told any of my friends yet.  All my disappointing friends that is.  Who wants friends that are going to be nice, a friend is supposed to tell me I look like an 80’s porn star, that I have a caterpillar on my lip, tell me I look like a douche, something.  They suck!
Mustache Rides pattern

Damn, I could have been a millionaire and gotten laid over and over.  Give me a few weeks, I’ll grow another one.