Apparently I have a super power called Skyler senses. I can sense every opportunity to get Skyler in trouble, even while I sleep.
My wife gets out of bed and goes to the bathroom or to kick the cat out of the room and I don't wake up. But if Skyler gets up to go to the bathroom, I wake up. Apparently this is because my goal in life is to get her in trouble. It couldn't be because she uses the bathroom without shutting the door. So I hear her drop the toilet seats down when she's done. And I hear her toilet flush. Now mind you, our door is cracked open for the cat, and where I sleep is in a direct line with that bathroom. Just as Cheri's recliner is a direct line to the kids room that she hears everything they do while I, on the couch, hear very little.
Last school year, Skyler was a pain in the ass to her mom. So during the summer we agreed, that we were going to come down on her this school year so she didn't end up that way again. Well, she came home and other than a few incidents, has actually been very good. But on the occasions that she's not, if I mention that I think she's doing something she's not supposed to be, I get a feeling that Cheri just thinks I'm out to get Skyler. Or if I say, this is how I would punish Skyler, I get the same thing. So, because Skyler is really doing well this year, that's apparently cause for us not to crack down on her.
First off, let me say, I do love Skyler as my own. I don't think Cheri believes that when I tell her, but I truly do. And I want what's best for her. Part of the reason I can be hard on her is because she does what she wants with very little consequences. Now is that how you would want your teenager to be before she goes out into the world on her own? To think she can smart off to her future professor at school or run her mouth to her boss. To do things with little regards too those around her. I want to prepare her for the real world. The whole world not just her world. Some may say it's too late because she's already set in her ways and isn't going to change. So does that mean I should just give up? Do you normally give up on your children? I'm pretty sure I never would have. But it seems that I am going to have to just to keep my marriage a happy one.
For those that don't know me, yes, I am just as hard on my kids. I will not hesitate to punish if I feel it is necessary. And you can ask anyone, my kids are well behaved. At least while they are living with me. What goes on at their moms house is beyond my control and a whole other post.
Now if or when Cheri reads this, she'll say I'm saying she's a bad mother. Because that's what I think she thinks this is about, that I'm proving I'm a better parent. Nothing could be further from the truth. There are a lot of things I could do or do better. She was criticized for 35+ years so she gets defensive a lot, sometimes even when I ask a simple question. I'm not criticizing her for anything. We just raise our kids differently, no one is saying I'm right and she's wrong or vice versa. This about getting Skyler as well prepared as we can for the next stage of her life. But I guess that is out of my hands now. I really hope she is ready for that next step in 9 months or so.